Showing posts with label Babes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Babes. Show all posts

Tuesday, 7 August 2012

Bristol Palin Makes Lame Excuses For Surgery

       Bristol Palin admits to getting plastic surgery, but claims that the reason for the surgery was medical... I smell bullsh*t.   She implies that the recent surgery is in some way related to a corrective jaw surgery she'd had back in December 2010.
      "Yes," she admits, "It improved the way I look, but this surgery was necessary for medical reasons...so my jaw and teeth could properly realign...I don't obsess over my face"

Still, "I am absolutely thrilled with the results," she says. "I look older, more mature, and don't have as much of a chubby little baby face!"
       I suppose the lip injections also served some necessary medical purpose too?  I am so sick of hearing people make excuses and lie about their motives for cosmetic surgery.   This only serves to make you seem even more self conscious and preoccupied with others' opinions of you.  Shed the stigma, and just admit that you wanted to alter something about your appearance in order to look better.   I find it hard to believe that Bristol's medical ailments were so neglected up until after her appearance on Dancing With The Stars.  

    It should be obvious that Bristol's new face was intentional, and not some kind of awesome side effect of a medically necessary operation.   

Us Weekly

Thursday, 26 July 2012

Hayden Panettiere Makes A Fool Of Herself

Why does every actress feel the need to also be a musician?  For that matter, why does everyone in the U.S. think that they posses vocal talents of any respectable degree?  Anyways, Hayden Panettiere released her new song from the movie Hoodwinked Too (just another obnoxious, generic, piece of  Pixar cultural pollution).
I used to be a Hayden fan, until that crying dolphin debacle in Japan, but I have now lost any glimmer of respect for her. 

Here's the dolphin video I mentioned.  It gets good about 23 seconds in.
I'm guessing that you now consider her to be an idiot, as I do.

Tuesday, 5 June 2012

Analysis of The Scene Queen

I've been analyzing this Scene Queen Pedophilia thing all day, and I think I've uncovered a genius  marketing scheme that exploits young girls' need for attention and a feeling of cultural relevance.   Applying my understanding of evolutionary biology, psychology, pornography, and marketing, I feel like I may have some solid answers to the formerly perplexing question of "What the f*ck is this sh*t??".
Analysis of The Scene Queen
Analysis of The Scene Queen

   I will begin by tackling the question of why these girls' appearances are so, seemingly, conflicted (i.e. the infantilizing accessories and clothing, carrying around stuffed animals and playing with Hello Kitty crap, but in harsh contrast, wearing loads of eye make-up and often having facial piercings).
Analysis of The Scene Queen

    To start with; whether they understand it in it's entirety or not, these Scene Queens are conforming to  the known  ideal associated with males' biological desire to mate with healthy and fertile females.  Men are sexually attracted to younger females, because they are more likely to be healthy and fertile.  This brings me to a concept known as "babyfaceness".

    Studies at universities in both Germany and the US found that when given a range of digitally altered images of the same face, males preferred the faces that had more childlike features (a large rounded forehead, large round eyes, a small nose, and small chin).  These findings simply support the theory that males are evolutionarily inclined to be more attracted to younger females.  For the full story of The Science Of Attraction, 

    This explains both the reason for the over sized quaff, and the heavy eye make up.  The large head of hair gives the illusion of a smaller chin.  By covering their foreheads with thick bangs, and teasing the hell out of their hair, it makes the upper region of their head appear much larger than the lower portion, simply by contrast (i.e. mimicking the symptoms of "babyfaceness").   The reason for the heavy eye make-up is that it helps to give the appearance of larger eyes.  Additionally, it obscures most of the eye area, which is where young women begin to show signs of aging first (dark circles, bags, wrinkles).
Analysis of The Scene Queen

  Next we will assess the Hello Kitty and stuffed animal crap...  The bright colors, obviously, draw the eye,  but are also associated with the way that we culturally dress our children.  In pornographic films and images (the ones geared towards male who are looking for "hot petite teens xxx") you will often find that the females will be wearing brightly colored plastic bead jewelry, or cute brightly colored socks.  This part is simple.  They wear childrens' clothing and accessories in order to appear more similar to what we, culturally, consider to be a child.
Analysis of The Scene Queen
Analysis of The Scene Queen

  The reason for the facial piercings only serves to say, "I am a naughty girl, and I do naughty things".  It gives the onlooker permission to view them in an "adult" manner.  Its that simple.

   Well, I still feel 100% uncomfortable with this creepy Scene Queen thing, but kudos to the horny old bastard who thought it up, and somehow got it to become trendy to appeal to pedophiles. 

Thursday, 17 May 2012

Scene Queens and Emo Girls, Pedophiles Love 'Em

Alright, this Scene Queen crap needs to stop.  I'm beginning to suspect that the trend was created by pedophiles, since the main objective of pulling together the perfect Scene Queen look involves making yourself appear as infantile as possible.  The more I look at these pictures, the more I can imagine some dirty old man panting away and working up a sweat while viewing these images. 
   Ugh, this feels so dirty to me.